Mass for Bob Cook

The Homily delivered by Jerry Sullivan,CSP

Sat. March 29, 2008

St. Thomas Aquinas Chapel
Storrs CT.


Bob Cook, truly, was very Catholic. He loved rituals. This Morning, he got most of you to gather at his home and follow him all the way to the Church. He orchestrated this same ritual many years ago for his Father the “Judge”. And after this Mass and when the prayers have been concluded, he will lead you again to that place on the hill, The Storrs Cemetery, where we will lay his body in a simple resting place. His body made from the dust of the earth. Now called a special vessel of clay because of his Christian Baptism will eventually become one with the earth. The very earth he walked upon; played upon; and relished like a child at play. Put snow on any soil with an elevation, he would ski down it; put a net on it, he would play volleyball on it; put a tractor on it and he would give you the best 4th of July ride of your life, through the Cook estate. I am told that he spent hours in the soil and ashes of a fire that all but destroyed his home, sifting and sorting and preserving his treasures. Bob was clever enough not to do any of this alone. He was like “Velcro” as he drew friends to play, to work, and to walk with him.
I met the real Bob Cook in ’81 during my years at St. Thomas Parish. That weekend in July, I married a couple in NY, and then spent time with my father who was recovering from surgery in a NY hospital and returned to the Parish Sunday evening. Monday early my sister called about our Father's unexpected death, and the meeting at the funeral home that morning. Then word got to the rectory that the Cook family experienced a tragedy. Young Bobbie Cook met with a fatal accident. My younger Paulist colleague ministered to the Cooks and I went to NY to take care of my mother and family. It was the first death in my family. I was still naïve that parents are immortal... After my father's funeral I returned to the parish by way of Hammonasset the parish campers were on vacation. I made my way over to the Cook campsite; they had made it down after their trying week also. I saw Bob and he saw me, and we embraced, and walked- we looked -few words just silence - with plenty of tears. I realized that a Human could experience the Pain of another human. Funerals for me, after that date, that you attend or preside at take on a deeper meaning once you have experienced the loss of your own flesh and blood. For this young couple Merrill and Bob to lose their second son, and I my own dear Dad. Seemed like Just pure loss, - deep sorrow. Only a length of time would heal.
Bob Loved attending the 10 am Mass in Center. He would say, “No offence Jerry I love you and your brother Paulists, but the children who gather at the 10 o’clock Mass scattered throughout the Center. It is their joy, fun and frolic; that’s what keep me alive. Bob the big kid who grew up -yet stayed always young. He had a zest for life, for community, for people.
Bob and I met again, after many years, two weeks ago today and then again the next day, Palm Sunday. Bob had written to me about his serious condition, and asked me to Say the Mass on the day of his Funeral whenever that was to be. Intuitively, I did not postpone my trip from NYC to Storrs. I made the arrangements. Arrived in Storrs, came to the Cook home on Separatist Rd. As usual an unlocked door welcomed me. I approached the bed cautiously, and the hug I had received 27 years ago at Hammonasset was still fresh. And he repeated it in his weakened condition. We talked, he shared his health reports, and then the stories of the support of his wife Merrill for so many years and his two kids, and then he laid out in general his wishes about the funeral and its details. But Sarah is in charge of that. On Sunday In our time together Bob asked for the Catholic Ritual for the seriously ill, so I performed the anointing with oil then the sacrament of reconciliation, and he received Holy Communion. Very few words just his sparkling eyes, his heart and his spirit. We met again soul to soul, quietly, an occasional tear but lots of hugs. And I bade him fare well as I was to return to New York City shortly.
The gospel that I proclaimed this morning, from St. Luke’s could well be one of Bob’s favorites if I quizzed him on his favorite gospel stories. That was not a frequent topic of conversation. It struck me this special Post Easter gospel of the two disciples who are walking in procession two abreast and then a third party joins them. Bob wanted you all to accompany him to church this Morning side by side in conversation or silence walking together, a sign to all that we are to walk together in life and death... The gospel story has the disciples going away from Jerusalem. What prompts this? Is it Disillusionment, fear, are they quitting? What is this about? They talked about Jesus death and were mystified. They were interrupted in their reverie by a stranger, Jesus himself, who hid his appearance somehow and was not recognized, except as a simple stranger, who joined their ranks. He inquired about their conversation, and they continued the depressing thoughts that their hopes seemed dashed because of Jesus’ recent suffering and death. His coming was so hopeful to those who followed him. They also mentioned the rumor afoot that the Lord Jesus had been resurrected and seen by some of their number. Jesus, then, goes through the Hebrew Scriptures with them. This is characteristic of the Lord, like the teacher, he takes the scriptures and opens up its deeper meaning to his disciples. They are slow learners and in need of instruction. Jesus starts from Moses, and the prophets, esp. Isaiah and shows how such a sad turn of events, suffering and death was foretold of old. - That the messiah would suffer and die. They began to see the point. It is getting dark; they invited the stranger to eat with them. And they sat at table when the stranger took the bread broke it and gave it to them. Their eyes were opened. He disappears. And they reveres directions get up and go back to Jerusalem. Now,now however, they are renewed, alive, and bursting to tell the story of how they met Jesus and recognized him in the breaking of the bread.
Bob Cook, my ritualist, led us to this church, to meet again our Lord. He wanted us to see and hear what he believed as we celebrate his life this morning; how he made the journey with friends throughout his life time and even today. He believed in the story and promise of the Lord’s Resurrection. He wanted you, his friends, to gather with his family at the celebration of the Eucharistic meal, the breaking of the bread, to hear again the story that Life redeemed by Jesus Christ is meant for glory and happiness. Life has meaning when spent for God’s glory and the well being of the human family.
Life we know, too well, is filled with the joys and the sorrows of our human condition. This past Lenten season Bob walked with Christ as the cancer grew in his body. He could identify with the mystery of Christ’s suffering. He spent Holy week counting his breaths, and counting also his blessings and friends. The Lord, in his great mercy, called Bob on Easter Monday to a new life. Now free of pain and death Bob begins his new life in Christ- there is no more mystery for him.
We the mourners pray with him for each other. That the values of friendship and generous living continue in your various families and communities; that we praise our God frequently, and thank him energetically for his many gifts to us. That the rituals of life and love deepen in meaning .That we can pass on these truths to the future generations.
My prayer this morning is that God walk with us daily as he did with the disciples in today’s gospel story,
I believe that it is Bob’s prayer today-That God will accompany each of you on your human journey through all of your lifetime, He adds a big hug and a loud Thank you to all His Friends.
And all God’s friends respond: Amen, Alleluia, and Thank You.